Back to work

Soooo I'm back! I returned to work last night, and it's hard. Their is a tragic reality that I still feel a sense of heirarchy, a sense of whether or not I'm as good as the next person. (In all aspects of life.) Words stumble and tumble abruptly from my lips when I try to have conversations with people. I have no sexy answer. I don't know what to say.

"Be yourself," you say.
Myself is sharp and abrasive, sarcastic or oblivious, self-effacing and sometimes shy. I don't know how to respond to peoples' questions or what to say to rude comments or empty silences.

But I showed up. And I tried. And I didn't sit too long by myself, only for a little while. I didn't go to work tonight because IT'S MY BIRTHDAY and I bought myself shoes on a really great sale :) They are amazing and adorable... <3 I also bought an iPhone and case and junk... damn those cases are expensive.

I am back tomorrow. I want to be good at this. I want to show up and dance. I want to make a lot of money. I want to manage it well, get out of debt, blah blah blah. Pay taxes?? If I have to I guess.

I used to write well but then I got distracted by the interwebs. dammit. More stories soon.